People love to complain. It’s empowering. It gets attention. It keeps them from having to look at their own issues. It creates a unified or divided front–often both. It creates drama. It expresses pent-up emotions, but they’re not attached to the real reasons so there’s no growth. And, as with everything, there is a price to pay.
Complaining is a pastime that wastes a lot of precious time. Employees love to complain about their work, their bosses, and other employees. Family members love to complain about each other. People in general love to complain about anything and everything that isn’t as they think it should be. When someone mistakes me for a dumping ground, I often ask them, “What was your part in it?” Inevitably, I get a dumbfounded look. Then, usually a few seconds pass before they continue with their rant about the other person, etc. I think this is incredibly self-centered and arrogant for them to assume I am okay with hearing their garbage. It’s just plain rude.
Back to the “everything has a price” issue. Complaining, which is usually through the veil of anger, causes emotional stress and anger is the worst. When the human body is stressed, it dumps the stress hormone cortisol. Small amounts of cortisol can give an energy jolt which is okay. Large amounts can do a lot of damage. Anger is harmful to the body and the brain. It can create blood sugar imbalances, decrease the effectiveness of the immune system, cause thyroid problems, lower the metabolism and contribute to obesity. It can cause the heart rate and blood pressure to increase which causes the muscles to tighten, etc.
I think anger kills. I think it causes heart attacks, strokes, cancer, arthritis, migraines, obesity, ulcers, etc. It assists the gene of addiction–causes relapse with binges, etc., slows emotional maturity, destroys marriages and relationships, is the root of domestic violence, causes job loss and for some it gets so bad they end up in prison. Is this an exaggeration? I don’t think so. Think about road rage. People shoot at each other over driving behavior. People have actually been killed over tailgating. Really? Looking at people, situations, and the anger within it, I noticed something very disheartening–people are angry in general and wherever they are in life they are going to find something to complain about so they can express their anger which is usually coming out sideways so it’s ineffective. Sad.
I don’t believe in status quo because I don’t think as human beings we can be stagnant–we are either going up or down. An angry person whose life is going okay will fiercely complain about some lame product they bought that they are unhappy with. If a family member gets into a car wreck during this same time, they will forget about that and end up complaining about the hospital, doctors, etc. Later, they will complain that the hurt family member is complaining – LOL. If they won the lottery they would complain about the taxes they had to pay. Nothing will ever satisfy them. Nothing. They pollute everywhere they go. They are sick and they are toxic. If they are not in the solution, I will not subject myself to them unless necessary and then, in as small of doses as possible. Being a dumping ground for them is called enabling–not helping. And today, I value myself more than that.
As human beings, we have 50,000 – 70,000 thoughts a day. It’s important to pay attention to the thoughts that create emotion because these are the ones you’ll act out on–especially the ones that create negative emotion. Life is short…very, very short. One of the simplest ways to start the real journey in life (which is the spiritual part) is by not complaining. I challenge you (and myself) to NOT complain for the next 24 hours. And, by the way…listening to someone complaining counts–that has to go to.
That’s it. Good luck and always remember to think about what you’re thinking about!